Funny Sayings and Funny QuotesOn this page you will find a huge collection of funny sayings and funny quotes on a number of different topics including some of the funniest sayings of all time. Find funny short sayings for t-shirts, bumper stickers, writing and a number of other things. ENJOY!Funny Bumper Sticker Sayings 
Keep honking...I'm reloading. If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer. Cover Me - I'm Changing Lanes. Read a huge list of funny bumper sticker sayings Funny Fortune Cookie Sayings You can always find happiness at work on Friday. A closed mouth gathers no feet. Oops...wrong cookie! Read a huge list of funny fortune cookie sayings Funny Redneck Sayings She’s so clumsy she could trip over a cordless phone! You look about as happy as a tick on a fat dog. He’s busier than a one-legged man at a butt kickin’ contest. Read a huge list of funny redneck sayings Funny Pirate Sayings 
Pirates do not cry, except in the case of the loss of a shipload of rum. No pirate shall discuss his feelings, unless his feelings include gutting a man from stem to stern and spilling his entrails. Pirate Law: Dousing oneself in beer is a perfectly acceptable replacement for a shower. Read more funny pirate sayings Great Idea Funny T-Shirt Sayings I’m in shape… Round is a shape. Irish I were drunk. SEX…do it for the kids. Read lots more funny t-shirt sayings Funny Movie Sayings 
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain't never seen a donkey fly. Ha, ha." ~ Shrek My husband and I fell in love at first sight... maybe I should have taken a second look. Funniest Sayings Of All Time When shooting a mime, don't use a silencer or his friends will hear you. Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep. USA Today has come out with a new survey. Apparently three out of every four people make up 75 percent of the population. Funny Hillbilly Sayings Life is simpler when you plow around the stumps. You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar, assuming you want to catch flies. Im fit’n to shut the lights off yall. Read a huge list of funny hillbilly sayings Funny Life Quotes and Sayings Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep. All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific. Life is not a static thing. The only people who do not change their minds are incompetents in asylums, and those in cemeteries. Funny Retirement Quotes and Sayings When you retire, you switch bosses - from the one who hired you to the one who married you. He who laughs last at the boss's jokes probably isn't far from retirement. Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. Read more funny retirement quotes In the mood for a little more funny? Check out funnyfix.com for short funny jokes, funny riddles and fun brain teasers. I hope you have enjoyed this collection of funny sayings. If you have a funny saying you would like to share with us please do so with the form below. You can share a single saying with us or you can create an entire page of your favorite funny sayings or funny quotes, and I will gladly host your page right here on the sayings plus.com website.
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Funny Birthday SayingsFunny Bumper Sticker Sayings
Funny Pirate Sayings
Funny Redneck Sayings
Funny Fortune Cookie Sayings
Funny T-Shirt Sayings
Funny Retirement Quotes
Hillbilly Sayings
Funny Life Quotes
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